Break the rules

Don't you love breaking the rules?  (Or is that just me!)

This week we lost someone that loved breaking through boundaries.

Dr Stephen Hawkins broke many rules.  When the medical practitioners gave him the 'rules' around his disease, he ignored them.  The 'rule' of the time was that people die within 5 years of diagnosis of ALS.  Therefore he 'should' have died at 25 - he lived to be 70!  When the IT practitioners told him what he wanted computers to do was not possible, he found ways of achieving what he wanted.  And when it came to the 'rules' around science - well I guess we all know what he achieved here.  And the key thing for me - everyone gained.

Now some rules are imporant - just think of the anarchy that would ensue if no-one stopped at a red light.  However, many of the rules we live our lives by are not 'law'; not agreed by 'society'.  They are held at a group level  - like the 'doctors' rules, the 'IT experts' rules, the 'scientists' rules.  But Stephen played by his own rules.  And that is where I take a lot of inspiration from.

We all have times when 'the cloud' comes over, those days where staying under the duvet feeling sorry for yourself seems like the best option.

It is on days like this that I think of Stephen Hawkins.  Had he allowed himself to stay 'under the cloud' he may well have been dead by 25!

In recent months I have received lots of well meaning advice about grieving - the 'rules' of grief.  I have broken the rules.  When the cloud of grief comes floating in, I have not played by the rules I have been told about - and interestingly, I have people say they are worried about me as I seem a bit too happy!  They fear I am bottling my grief and putting on a brave face.

I am not brave.  I am just kicking that cloud back over the horizon and following my own rules - to make each day the best that it can be which is the inspiration that I take from Dr Stephen.  He made each day the best it can be despite many restrictions and the impression I got was that he really enjoyed life.

What about you?  Are you someone that likes to live by other's rules?  How would life be for you if you broke some of them?

I'd love to hear your comments below...

Published by Caroline Cavanagh Clinical Hypnotherapist and author of Anxiety Alchemy. on |

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