What to do when life gets you down

Play a little game with me please.....the image above - do you see vases or faces?

And if you saw one, can you see the other now that you know it is there?

When you are made aware of something else it can change how you see things that were always there, it is just your perception that has changed.  And this week, I was reminded of something that is a great way of changing perception at those times when you can become fixed on a certain way of looking at things.

Have you noticed that when things are going well, it is really easy to do all those things that help you to feel positive?  Ie - easy to have happy thoughts when you are.....well, happy (or see the vases if you are only looking for vases!) However, when you really need to use techniques to pick you up, that is the time it is hardest to use them!  

I wrote a little e-book a while back that gave 30 tips on how to deal with stress, working on the basis that with 30 techniques, there will be at least 2 or 3 that most people can relate to and some of them are REALLY easy to use even if you are very down in the dumps!  However, this week I could make it 31 having found another one which I think is a brilliant way of seeing the other side of things - and I have to give the credit to a client for having shared it with me.

And it is all based on 5 simple words:

This is what I've chosen

Now it may take a few minutes to get your head around why these words can be useful to use when you are at a low point in life.  Let me see if I can help you along the way.....

Life doesnt' throw low balls.  Life just happens.  We turn those 'happenings' into low balls or bouncy balls!  It is all perception. One person may see redundancy as the end of the world, another may celebrate the opportunity to get out of a job they never really liked anyway!  It is just a 'thing' to which you have given a meaning.

So when you are feeling down; be that sad, depressed, angry, frustrated - yep, the list could go on......recognise that the feelings you have are based on a choice that you have made - the way you are choosing to see things - perhaps not consciously but you can consciously choose to see something else!

Last weekend I felt as if someone had done me an injustice and I was pretty aggrieved by it.  I used something from my 'first aid kit' to help me feel better (and you can read more about that here) but it was still a bit sore.  This Is What I've Chosen has now left me pain free.  I recognised I had chosen to react in a certain way to the text.  I could have picked up the phone there and then and spoken to the person which may have led to a different emotion - I didn't - and that was a choice.  And I had chosen to feel aggrieved when there were other options - like laughing it off, putting it down to experience, seeing it as her 'issue' and not mine etc.  I was choosing to look at the vase and not the face - but the face was there to be seen if I chose to look for it!

When you are down it is often the result of limiting your choices - almost as if you have backed yourself in a corner.  These 5 words I believe help get you out of that corner; help you to realise that there are other options, other choices that can be made based on looking at things in a different way.

When you allow yourself to take responsibility for how you feel, it gives you the option to feel differently; your feelings....well, they are your choice!

What do you think to this now you have read this far?  Do you believe you can choose how you feel?

Please do comment below, I would love you know how you feel about this!!

Published by Caroline Cavanagh Clinical Hypnotherapist and author of Anxiety Alchemy. on |


RE: What to do when life gets you down

Definitely responsible for how I feel and this article a great reminder that I don't always make the right choice! Love these blogs!
Commented by: Andrea Bathurst on Tuesday 29th May 2018 05:28:10 PM

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